Sexual Futurist™ Blog
Just as with skin pigmentation, height, or caloric needs, when it comes to our need for sexual touch we are all somewhere on the scale of normal human diversity.
Sexual fantasies are Mother Nature's changing room in the sexual department store of life. Once inside the privacy of my own mind, I can try ideas on for size.
The intelligent management of sexuality & discovering our sexual needs is hindered by a number of variables, but they ultimately are ideas (like the seatbelt) that will catch on.
Sexual needs start in childhood and they are part of us for as long as we live. It's time we started talking about them.
We're all supposed to have sex with someone we're interested in before deciding to get permamently hitched, right? The problem is that when we do, the data collected isn't really relevant to the task at hand: finding a compatible mate.
Sure, you two can do it, but can you talk about it? Most people have figured out the mechanics of “doin' it,” but very few people can talk about sexuality.
Do you think "safe sex" means using a condom? Making sure consent is explicit? You're right, but there's so much more.
I have been a Marriage & Family Therapist for the last 30 years and, in all those years, never have I (or anyone else in my profession) experienced anything like the impact of COVID-19.
What do we mean by the term "needs?" Many times, we use the word "need" to refer to "that which the organism requires in order to survive." This is totally legitimate when we're talking about surviving in the raft after the ship goes down or surviving in a time of plague.
We have only just now reached the inflection point in human history where we could even begin this conversation. Up until this very time, the conversation has been blocked twice over by (1) our need to address the problem of survival and (2) older cultural institutions that claimed this subject matter as theirs.